Say a clinician offers three ways to handle your knee pain — physical therapy, an injection, or surgery — and none of them is clearly wrong.
When you compare care options that each carry real tradeoffs, the questions that matter most cover five things: what each option does, what it costs in time and money, how solid the evidence is, what matters most to you, and how you’ll know it worked. Asking about all five is what turns a rushed choice into a shared decision.
This guide turns a framework used to train clinicians — the Agency for Healthcare Research and Quality’s (AHRQ) SHARE Approach — into questions you can ask from the patient’s side of the table. If you haven’t already done the broader groundwork for an upcoming visit, Start Here covers what to prepare before you reach this stage.
Is This Decision Urgent? A Safety Note First
If you’re facing a medical emergency — chest pain, severe bleeding, trouble breathing, sudden confusion — don’t use this page to weigh options. Call your local emergency number or go to the nearest emergency department. What follows is for planned, non-urgent decisions where you have time to think and ask questions.
How Do You Organize Questions About Benefits, Costs, and Uncertainty?
AHRQ’s SHARE Approach breaks shared decision making into five steps for clinicians: Seek the patient’s participation, Help them compare options, Assess their values, Reach a decision together, and Evaluate how it’s going. The six stages below translate that into questions you ask.
Is There Actually a Choice to Make?
Start by confirming a real choice exists before you spend energy comparing options that may not really be optional.
- “Is there more than one reasonable way to handle this, or is one option clearly recommended for medical reasons?”
- “Is watching and waiting a real option here?”
- “Is this urgent, or do I have time to think it over or get a second opinion?”
What Does Each Option Actually Do — Benefits and Harms Side by Side?
Once you know a choice exists, ask for the benefits and harms of each option stated in plain, comparable terms.
- “What is this option supposed to fix, and how likely is that for someone like me?”
- “What are the realistic risks or side effects — not just the rare worst case?”
- “How does recovery time or daily impact compare between these choices?”
- “Is there a decision aid or handout I can take home and review?”
If an answer is vague — “it usually works well” — ask for it in more concrete terms, such as how many people out of 10 or 100 tend to improve, and over what timeframe.
What Will Each Option Cost You in Time, Money, and Logistics?
Cost and access shape which option is actually livable, and they’re easy to leave out of a rushed visit.
- “How many visits or follow-ups does each option realistically require?”
- “Is this typically covered by insurance, and how would I find out before committing?”
- “Does it require transportation, time off work, or help from someone else during recovery?”
If you keep written notes from your visits, Organize Your Health Story has a format for tracking answers like these so they travel with you between appointments.
How Solid Is the Evidence, and What’s Still Unknown?
Medical evidence is rarely a sure thing. Naming the uncertainty out loud makes comparing options more honest.
- “How confident is the research behind this option — strong evidence, or more limited?”
- “What don’t we know yet that could change how well this works for me?”
- “If this doesn’t work, what’s the fallback, and does trying it first cost me anything later?”
Which Option Fits What Matters Most to You?
This is the stage where your answer carries more weight than anyone else’s, because it’s about your priorities, not just the medical facts.
- “Given these tradeoffs, is it more important to me to recover quickly, avoid a bigger risk, minimize cost, or keep future options open?”
- “Do upcoming plans or caregiving responsibilities make one option’s recovery timeline harder for me than another’s?”
- “Would I rather try the more conservative option first, or address this more definitively now?”
How Will You Know If the Decision Is Working?
A decision doesn’t end when you leave the appointment — Take Part in Care Decisions covers how to raise these questions during the visit itself.
- “Can I take time to think this over or get a second opinion before deciding?”
- “When and how will we check whether this option is working?”
- “What would tell us it isn’t working, and what happens next?”
If your check-in date arrives and the option you chose isn’t producing the change you expected, that’s the signal to go back to your clinician and ask about the fallback — not to wait indefinitely and hope it catches up.
A Short Worksheet You Can Bring With You
If you only have room for a handful of questions in one appointment, these cover the framework above:
- What are my realistic options, including doing nothing for now?
- What are the likely benefits and harms of each one, in plain terms?
- What will each option cost me in time, money, and daily disruption?
- How solid is the evidence, and what’s still unknown?
- Which option best fits what matters most to me right now?
- When and how will we know if the choice I make is working?
What This Guide Does Not Do
This page prepares your questions. It does not tell you which option is best, calculate your personal risk, or suggest one option is safer for your situation — only a clinician with your full history can weigh that. It doesn’t replace a second opinion or insurance or legal guidance about coverage disputes.
Common Questions About Comparing Care Options
What if my clinician doesn’t offer a choice at all?
Ask directly whether other reasonable options exist, since a choice isn’t always volunteered even when one is available. If the answer is that this is the only medically appropriate path, ask what makes it the only one — that answer itself is useful information.
Is it rude to ask for numbers instead of general reassurance?
No — asking “how many people out of 100” or “how much evidence supports this” is a standard, welcome part of shared decision making, not a challenge to your clinician’s judgment. It’s the second step of the AHRQ framework this page is built on.
Can I bring these questions to a specialist as well as my primary care provider?
Yes. These questions apply to any visit where more than one reasonable path forward exists, whether that’s a primary care decision or a specialist consult.
What if I don’t understand the answer I’m given?
Ask your clinician to explain it a different way, or ask them to check that you’ve understood correctly by repeating it back in your own words. This is sometimes called “teach-back,” and it’s a normal part of a good conversation, not a sign you’re behind.
Do I have to decide during the same appointment?
Not usually, for a non-urgent decision. Ask directly how much time you have, and whether you can think it over, talk to family, or seek a second opinion before committing.
Sources and How This Was Written
The framework above is adapted from AHRQ’s SHARE Approach to shared decision making, a five-step model developed to help clinicians and patients compare care options together, and AHRQ’s broader shared decision making resources. Better Health Questions is an independent educational publication, not affiliated with AHRQ or any clinical organization; we translate published guidance into plain-language questions and do not interpret it on the agency’s behalf.
Medical Information Disclaimer
This article is for general educational purposes only and does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment recommendations. It does not tell you which care option to choose. Always discuss your specific situation with a qualified healthcare provider, and contact emergency services for urgent symptoms.
By Better Health Questions Editorial Team. Last updated September 2026.